Word’s clearly have a power over people, there’s an openness to them that make people stop and think. At first when I received the email from my father I wasn’t sure what to think and how to feel. I know he had been reading it, or at least knew it was there. There is a difference between him and my mother. I’ve grown up with her and she knows what I’m like, she understands the brutality of my thoughts and honesty in how I think, it’s just me, I don’t mean any harm but I’m not going to change because I don’t want to be someone else.
I know my mum hasn’t and probably won’t read this, it is like what I tried to say in my first blog “Who’s ever going to read this”
You’ll have thoughts and words never voiced, questions never answered, here’s the chance to grab that little bit of hope that maybe they will see this.
If I tried to tell my mum about my blog, she would tell me she’s seen my website, she wouldn’t understand I was trying to reach out to her and that this was something new. But my father understands this, it may be due to the fact that he hasn’t grown with me constantly going – look at my new website I made (I run a small web-design company – Spongedesign) or it may be down to personality.
The point is that when you read something or write something it can stir emotions in you that you thought were long buried, when I write about things this is an exploration of self. I am looking into the past and these things don’t directly impact my present state of mind but they have all come together to influence who I am.
I know if I here a good song lyric or read a good book. My mind will begin to tick and it will make me wonder about life and how I life mine. Much like the bible does for many people all over the world, the bible is a great book because the words and stories can be applied to so many situations, it is a great learning aid for people who need some direction, which is why religion is so powerful. The words and the teachings give those that need it, direction.
I want to go back to this email but I’m not sure what to say – it’s clear that when we write is one time we can really say what we want, when the words don’t matter and of course there are unexpected reactions to these, all we can do is stick to our guns, hold onto what we know and believe, and weather the storm.
I guess this goes part way to explaining my love of all words, literature, poetry, music. There is so much emotion there that you are bound to feel different, that even in your darkest hour, a good book or a good song can bring you right back to the surface and help you carry on. To all you writers, authors, blogger’s, musicians…everyone. Thank you