Journal – I am sitting up waiting for Lucy. I want to talk to her. I’m going to find out what’s on her mind because I can’t do this alone. I’m going to go call her.
I tried calling Lucy but no answer, straight to voicemail. Is she avoiding me? has something bad happened? why is her phone off? I can’t believe this would happen from a girl who sat by my side watching me and waiting. A girl who hardly knows me. She wouldn’t be ignoring me. Oh god!
I can’t believe I was getting so paranoid earlier, I think it’s these drugs, Lucy said she would visit again soon.
My mind is going in circles, I think something is seriously wrong – I can’t reach the panic button, my arms refuse to move, I am writing this at the tips of my fingers, hoping a nurse will come by soon. Help me! I need to hide you, the secrets in your pages are to grave.
Lucy visited today, apparently I was found on my stomach half way out of the hall, muttering about conspiracies and acting hysterical – I lashed out at a nurse and they have moved me to a secure unit. Lucy found and brought my Journal to me and we sat and talked for a few hours. I trust her greatly, I need her now but I am scared. I think someone has got to me – these hallucinations are unnatural, like I am being drugged in my sleep. I need to get this story out, but who can I trust where can I go.
I don’t think I can deal with this pressure, Lucy has told me of her parents – a horrible coincidence that makes me fear for her life even more, but, maybe she can help me. Maybe we are stronger as a team, I’ve yet to decide. The doctors tell me I should sleep and I can see how bloodshot my eyes are, a little scrap of glass I found in my bed my only mirror.